Q&A Blogpost

From the comment section of Why We Dream:

10/28/08 12a-3a Houston, TX.
Last night I had two dreams...

The first dream was me boarding a cruise ship. It was a nice warm night, the water was calm. The cruise ship was beautifully lit with white lights everywhere and the harbor/port was buzzing with soft and romantic boats and sounds.
Dreams of vehicles that go over water portray how you are moving through changes and how you feel about the changes.
I was with a group and we took a small wooden boat to get to the larger one. As we approached my mother dove in with joy. Almost like she couldn't resist the urge to be in this calm and lovely sea. I jumped in, in fear after her. Then I realized I was the one in danger. Not actually in danger but the only one scared.
This portion of the dream portrays your fear of jumping into relationships. You dive in after your mother from the sense of following in your mother's footsteps in terms of how she approaches relationships. Since everything and everyone in the dream is a reflection of you, your more 'adult' or nuturing side (mother) is feeling the need to 'jump in' even while you remain afraid.

Then I could hear the fish as if they were in a large school as the brushed the bow's bottom as they swam by. Then an extremely large, big mouthed fish that was brown and green in color with big eyes buzzed me. Almost just saying hey I see you and it's no big deal but I was here first. This portion of the dream suggests that indeed, there is life swimming 'below the surface' in the deeper aspects of what you attempt to keep out of conscious awareness. Its all good.

The second was me falling in love. The man was a close family friend, mostly of my older brother. He and I don't speak in waking life, so the fact that we were just normal in the dream was a great feeling. I felt no fear, animosity or regret around him. I was comfortable. My brother and I seemed to be living or staying in a big open house. There were no rooms but there were doors. I just didn't know where they went. There were a lot of high windows with lots of sunlight coming in but the house was just grey in color but in a warm, peaceful way. There were lots of posts like in a big cabin and lots of stairs. There was no furniture. I was the only one who went upstairs where there were lots of empty shelves.
This second portion of the dream reveals the deeper aspects of how you move into relationships. Family members can portray how the past might have influenced why you keep yourself 'reserved.' The big open house shows you exploring your potential, but please notice how the house:
--has no rooms but has doors...it has no furniture but lots of posts...and empty shelves.--This is a snapshot of both, how you hide and your fear of having nothing to offer in a relationship.

The 'aha' to me is the repetitiveness of doors, posts and the chain link fence at the end....
AHA: something that is being protected in this way cannot be filled with furniture (ideas to rest upon) or have things on the shelves (what you can share with others and how you present your ideas to others.) Since the house represents your 'inner architecture' here are things to consider: no rooms but doors? are there no walls? Is this a snapshot of having an easy escape?

There was something drawing this friend and me closer together and I knew we were in love but I didn't want to disappoint my brother, my family. I kept hiding things from them and denying my feelings to this man. I kept thinking they have to know. Each time my brother went out the front door I was sure it was because he was upset or felt awkward that this man and I had a connection. Finally the man couldn't take it and wouldn't accept it anymore. As he was professing his love and I clearly felt the same my brother came upon us. I was so worried and he just walked away. NOt in an angry or disappointed way but saying "I knew all along I'm happy for you" or "I never cared the way you thought I did I just want you happy." For a woman, the male becomes symbolic of moving fearlessly in the world. This portion of the dream reflects how you are ready for a fulfilling relationship.

Then the scene changed from us in this place announcing our love to me meeting him outside school. It must have been a high school or grade school. I met him outside. He was very excited because they had just discovered his natural ability to instantly formulate nourishment? I don't really know how to explain it now, but in the dream he said "watch, i take 10 sprints then I eat a banana and 3 teaspoons of peanut butter and I'm a machine" It was like a new invention and he had been hired by endorsers and athletes and teams worldwide. He would be very successful and I was so proud of this person and loved him so much.

The last portion of the dream takes place in a school setting (learning) and focuses on nourishment (how you have been trained to find nourishment.) Food in a dream is a more broad view of how you find nourishment in life. His ability to "formulate nourishment" is a classic snapshot of 'hiding the banana' or the covert way that your mind is saying....I like sex...it nourishes me. He (you) is even getting endorsements on that idea! This suggests that you are opening to intimacy.

I continued to follow him as he made formulas for all of our turns. We were running and laughing and were very happy. As we rounded a chainlink fence from an alley to a new street I thought "when do I tell him this will not work out? when do i tell him that someone so much younger than me can't make this work? That right now things are great but in real life they won't be very soon?"
Here, the chain link fence appears, it becomes obvious how you sabotage relationships. The idea is no longer hidden in the obscurities of the large open house... You wonder how to bring it up. This is a conversation you need to have with yourself. What are you afraid of?

As we rounded the corner (now on vespas) he asked me to join him at his favorite taqueria. It was a like this soulful, hip hubub while everything around seemed lifeless (buildings/people walking by). There were all kinds of interesting people on the patio. The tacqueria or 'foreign' restaraunt suggests that you need to find a new way, an exotic way, a more foreign way (or something different from what you have done in the past) to receive nourishment in life.

Two girls took my attention. They were having breakfast with iced coffees with cream. They had also just ordered two shots and dropped a dark liquid into what looked like milk. I remembered wondering if it was coffee dropped in kailua? They were so happy to be friends. The image of dropping liquid in cream is another way of exploring sex for more profound fulfillment....kind of like nourishment from the breast when you are a baby (your reference to cream.)

I woke up waiting for him to come back out. Wondering what he would surprise me with next. Perhaps you are exploring a new relationship or going through changes in your approach because of something you are observing in your mother or work you are doing in this area. Either way, your mind is awakening you to how you might find real fulfillment. The work consists of understanding what you are protecting and how your fear of intimacy can lead to a sense of constant rejection. While you do not own the condition, you can only feel victimized as if it is happening to you, and not because of your own fears.